Going More Than a Week Without Sex? Here’s What Really May Be Happening
Opinion By The MoodFood Cooperative
As we all know life gets busy as work piles up, the kids demand your free time, the chores seemly never end and before you know it a week has passed without you and your partner having any real intimate connection. This happens more than you think, but here’s the thing: if it’s been a week (or more), it’s more than a busy schedule it’s a warning sign that your relationship could be losing a crucial form of emotional and physical closeness.
Why RegularIntimacy Actually Matters
Sex is not only fun, it also acts relationship superglue. Sexual activity boosts oxytocin (a.k.a. the “bonding hormone”), reinforces trust and keeps the spark alive. When physical connection becomes infrequent, it doesn’t just affect the bedroom it sneaks into your day-to-day:
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- You start feeling more like roommates than partners
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- Heightens your stress or irritability
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- More misunderstandings lead to emotional distance
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- You become less motivated to initiate intimacy
Basically, if the bedroom is too quiet the ripple effect shows up everywhere else or conversely the effect of everything else leads to a quiet bedroom.
How This Usually Happens…and it’s not malicious
Most couples don’t wake up one day and decide, “Let’s stop connecting physically.” It obviously more gradual. Maybe one partner is wiped out after a long day and the the other partner doesn’t initiate because they don’t want to “pressure.” A week goes by, then another and before you know it, emotional closeness starts slipping.
The real issue arises once this pattern sets in. Once ingrained it tends to continue unless something intentional shakes it up.
A Simple Checkpoint
Here’s a no-nonsense rule of thumb: if a full week has passed without sexual or intimate contact, it’s time to pause and ask:
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- Are we too exhausted or disconnected to initiate?
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- Are we avoiding intimacy for any reason, even subconsciously?
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- Are we connecting non-sexually?
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- What’s one thing we can do this week to reconnect?
With the goal being intentionality (i.e. keeping intimacy a normal, expected and enjoyable part of your relationship) it may make sense to make a regular plan for sex.
Small Steps Can Make a Big Difference
Restarting intimacy doesn’t have to be dramatic. Simple, intentional actions often do the trick:
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- Talk openly about how you are both feeling
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- Reintroduce small gestures like hugs and kisses, especially when you greet or leave each other
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- Get creative and plan a few dates…activities that you wouldn’t normally do together
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- Give yourselves 30 minutes to talk about your day (not to solve each others problems) to listen, learn and authentically care
So, if you’re sitting there thinking “It’s been a week…maybe two?” take it from the Cooperative, it’s time to take action…Listen, Learn, Laugh, Love (i.e. connect). Your relationship will thank you.Gon